Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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