no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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