Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize