i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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