Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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