then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
