Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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