fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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