did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
