Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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