It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
