i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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