sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Randomize