I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Randomize
