So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
That's an oxymoron.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."