He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Randomize