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• (734): View more from Michigan

  I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.

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• (912): View more from Georgia

  I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?

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• (865): View more from Tennessee

  He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  You said you were "testing the product for Chris."

  (848): View more from New Jersey

  I'm a bad man.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (985): View more from Louisiana

  Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.

  (1-985): View more from Louisiana

  Do I have a choice?

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"

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