Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(956): View more from Texas

What do you think she thinks of us?

(1-956): View more from Texas

I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us

Fav 8 2558 817
share tweet
(646): View more from New York

how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?

Fav 69 1002 2545
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(512): View more from Texas

Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.

(405): View more from Oklahoma

I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.

(512): View more from Texas

Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.

Fav 64 3026 1041
share tweet
(772): View more from Florida

I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"

Fav 12 2392 1094
share tweet
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Read it at the TFLN blog
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks

Fav 8 2614 1268
share tweet
(920): View more from Wisconsin

That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.

Fav 6 1218 2475
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(775): View more from Nevada

Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent

Fav 6 826 1427
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(631): View more from New York

He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.

Fav 16 2853 1144
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(925): View more from California

I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.

Fav 1 65 7
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT