SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
