I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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