never play flip cup with pint glasses
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10