areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I am naked and annoyed.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.