how can u be prego again
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Randomize
