He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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