You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
