if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
