I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
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