I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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