I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
