8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
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