Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
