Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Randomize
