his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
