Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'm always down for nudity.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize