i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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