i think my mom watched the whole time
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Randomize