He asked to "fluff my boner.."
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
