She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
this hospital has no fireball
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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