Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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