I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
