Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
