At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
We just shotgunned beers for America
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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