i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
cat food counts as protein by the way
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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