great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
