What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
You left your phone here
Wait...
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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