after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
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