my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
