put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
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