Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
