guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
