The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
All I want is dick and wine.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
