id be glad to
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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